inside and out, he's better than i am.

today is the day that my older brother zach foster jacobsen was born. and i can't say it was the best day of my life because i obviously wasn't born yet. what i can say though, is that no one has ever loved me the way my brother does. i began to collect videos to put this video (later in the blog) and while watching them i recognized that even at the age of 2, my brother delighted in me and was so proud of me. even though he and my older sister would see how far they could make my head bounce when my mom left the room (when i was like a month old, might i add--that explains a lot)...even though he dared me to slide down the stairs on my stomach head first in a sleeping bag and i nearly knocked out my teeth...even though he told me NOT to walk into the school with him my first day of high-school, i know that my wonderful brother loved me. i miss the old days with zach. the elementary school days. when we would fight over if we watched the wild thornberry's or sports center in the morning before getting picked up to go to school (clearly the obvious choice is wild thornberry's but sports center always won because my dad would want to watch it too). the days where we would pop a cd, usually something along the lines of "play" or "no secrets", into my super awesome purple boom box and toss a nerf ball around. it is those simple moments with my brother that i remember most. it was just me and him and in those moments, we were best friends. but then middle school came around for him and we drifted apart. he met his best friends that year and they now live together. thats another thing about zach that amazes me. he has kept the same group of friends for almost 10 years now. i guess that concept is so foreign to me because typically the friends in my life came and went and thats okay. we drifted apart in those years and i wish i could go back and hang out with him more and not be so annoying so he would want to hang out with me. but then in high school we got a little closer. he was so protective of me and i was so protective of him. i remember we were at a young life camp, summer of 2009, and it was my birthday and my friends made a huge deal about him saying happy birthday to me and giving me a hug. he was so embarrassed but he did it. i knew he loved me. later that day, i was in a pie eating contest (side note--i love eating contests). it was actual apple pie which i dont like, it wasnt just whipped cream. and i remember feeling apple pie in my nose and coming close to vommitting in front of hundreds of people but i look over and zach is there. oh zach. my proud brother who was almost jumping on the stage cheering me on telling me i could do it. he believed in me so much. and now, zach and i are closer than ever. he is legitimately the kindest, most thoughtful and peaceful person i know. any "good" words to describe someone you can think of, thats my brother. sounds so cliche, but i mean it with all of my heart. if i was even half of the person my brother is, i would be a wonderful person. a little before christmas i remember talking to him about what we were getting for the other people in our family, and trying to do something special for my grandma and he said "i don't care if i spend all my money i have, i'm going to make sure i get you all something special" and i just thought that was so nice. how many 21 year old college boys would say that?! not many. so this is a tribute to my wonderful WONDERFUL brother. zach, thank you for making me feel so protected and loved and special for all these years. i love you more than you will ever know.

watch the video here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UG82Klo_xTQ&feature=youtu.be